Pre-Stemless
Welcome to the beginning.
Random/Noises
“We’re all a catheter. Boozzake fishcakes.”
A pure expression of free sound. Disobedient. Charming. Annoying. Childlike. Maximally shallow.
Witticism/Shallow Jam
[“You’re standing on my head”] “Haha I have your hair!”
An acknowledgement of the other with a wish to play, maybe a compulsion to respond. Potentially confusing stemless with improv.
Freezing
“”
The rules are in reach, and loud. But in a double bind with respect to owning or expressing them. Potent, almost there, just woefully underneath it all.
Circling
“I feel some fear right now, being here.”
…When in doubt. Familiar. Easy to find the others, if only they would cooperate. Richness of feelings, carefully placed imagery.
Establishing shared reality/Responding
“No, that’s not exactly it” or “Is it that you’re feeling worried about her?”
Now, trying to cooperate. Moving towards coziness, away from the explosiveness. The opposite direction of stemless.
Pointed Stemless
You’ve tasted it now, in others if not a bit yourself. If you concentrate hard, invest your time well, and save up your goodies, you can almost always do it.
Judgement
“You’re feeling unsafe.”
Finally, the relief of being able to name truths you were never allowed to! No more tentativeness! You’ve made it.
Gotcha
“You want to push her to her edge!”
There are no rules anymore, time to use it for good. Pincer-like noticings of other people, laser beams intended to relax someone’s contraction. Reveals much about the speaker, through a little keyhole. Takes time to spin-up and craft, often.
Cruelty
“You’re annoying.”
Radical honesty tearing through, to ever deeper forbidden regions. Fast, sometimes easy. Vulnerable. Adrenalized.
Double drawing/Cave-diving
“We are in a prison, and you have been locking and unlocking our exit.”
The dimensions beyond feelings and beyond sharp judgements, something a little softer starts to emerge. Excited. Finessed. Tongue sticking out, cocked head. Occasionally coming out for air, looking around to see if someone caught it. Unsatisfied, but always working on the next one.
Meta
“You need to tell me I’m doing well!”
A willingness to let Stemless swallow you, dissolve and expunge your logics for all to see, once and for all. Intelligent, courageous; still tight and in pain from being unable to dissolve the reality of desperation. Exhausted and cheated, by how even this ultimate trick to step out, just didn’t work! If only there was a way to give this up too…
Vastness
Relaxation begins now, and with it, some real stemless.
Excusing/Blaming
“If I speak my truth, you won’t be able to handle it!”
After much cajoling, it’s becoming clear how pointing outside can be a way to look inside. No longer only rescuing others via blaming. Some recognition of this creating-your-own-reality business people keep talking about. Possible, now, to connect with your innocence in all this, and thereby an ease of confidence. The meaningfulness of this “game” is in sight.
Laughter
“Oh, oh— I’m supposed to be giving you the best gifts!”
Relief. Realization dawns that this really is about your own experience, not anyone else. Dream logic is beautiful, imaginary. Just as frozen as in Freeze, but endless space makes it possible to walk around it, admire it.
Mundanity
“We are four people and we move our mouths.”
Things are getting serious. Owning experience is going into newer places. Beyond feelings, beyond judgement, owning even perception. Even real logics are relaxing — maybe? — into dreams. Exhilarating. Terrifying.
Poetry
“A single finger points from me to you. You’d better duck.”
Now, on this eternal beach we’ve been walking, with nothing to prove, no need for pronouncements, no need to shout that we really are in a beach-dream. Without finality, why not dip a single foot in the dreamy water anyway? Take someone’s hand and twirl. Ecstatic.
Musing
“Every other time, there is a gap.”
Not running anymore. Even more relaxed. The world has only your children, and you don’t even have to be one to live the fullness of being utterly free. Elderly. There are incredibly deep things to realize, but nothing to capture.
Teaching
“Only now is the time to find it.”
Important ownership of the last vestiges of imperatives, within this enormous generosity of infinite form. Other people are here, and we really are in this together. It is possible again to have aspirations, purpose, desperation, even when everything is perfect.
Subtlety
It’s time to find reality again, the others.
Jamming
[“You’ve been falling in that same corner over and over”] But, but… I’m smelly!
Understanding emerges at the subtler layers. Every love has an art of love. No longer popping a handstand, but walking, dancing. Conversations are possible again, but most of the surrounding background paragraph is transmitted without verbalization.
Forgiveness/Bliss
“shower me off, please”
All sentences are only big jaw smiles with bedroom eyes. Background realities have embraced background realities, booming chests bigger than bodies or boundaries. There was never any need for protection, and there never will be again. It is possible to be this happy.
Apology/Shame
“oh… no.”
From deep contentment, suddenly a flash of deeper love. Tears more honest than any mere feelings. Everyone’s been here all along, waiting. Heart beating, a real beating heart. There really is a baby, right there, in those bulbous eyes… What have I been doing?
Poetry, but literally
“You are the king.”
Absolute honesty in connection, total reality that lasts a single moment and occasionally forms into words. Literal as it can get, the most genuine use of words.
Stemless
Escape.
Pure, non figurative, dream.
“.”
The cosmic joke, gotten.
Free to react
“I can’t handle this.”
Flirting with danger.
Others are free to react
[“What the fuck, asshole, did you just scratch my car?”] [“Huh? No, that wasn’t me!”]
Let the people shouting at each other on the street own that, pure expression.
Post-Stemless
“I’m fine. How are you?”
Thales held there was no difference between life and death.
"Why then," said one, "do you not die?"
"Because," said he, "there is no difference."
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